Sunday, November 16

Sunday Shine* { Gonna Be All Right }

Things have been nasty and negative at work all week. It all started when.... I finally brought up, at a meeting, the fact that the guidance counselor has never seen any of the special needs students for their counseling sessions. She tried to say that she had, but had no proof of this, nobody could back her up, and each student told me she'd never had a session with them. Some had no idea she was the guidance counselor. She even stormed into my room to imply that the students and para-educators were lying. That was two Fridays ago. Her bad energy (aka guilty conscience) spilled over into last week, the principal became involved, things just weren't right. All that on top of the enormous pressures that build up in the ELA department two months before the state exam.
Those old feelings of wanting to quit on the spot started creeping in, so I had to remind myself of everything and everyone that's been making me feel better:

- My students. We fight, we love. It has never been clearer to me that I do it for them. I think our classroom has become a space for learning people skills and building relationships, we keep each other in check.
-Sleep. I come home drained, I'm too tired to make dinner and one time I tried to order in, but fell asleep before it even got here. I needed to catch up and I'm glad I did, but I do owe some folks an apology for not showing up or calling or answering the door when I said I would.
- Whenever I wanna talk shit, but don't feel like spreading the negativity, I just listen to Marlena Shaw. She reminds me of one of my closest friends, Luz. Nasty hilarious.
- The rain. It brought some much needed calmness to the classroom Thursday and Friday and kept my Saturday simple and quiet.
- Chocolate. I'm in my red tent right now, and I snuck in a snack.

1 comment:

GirlGriot said...

Oh, having some negative and nasty around my job, too. None of it touching me too directly, but spreading its bad air all over the place.

I'm glad the end of the week was better for you, B, and hope this new one will be shinier!