Tuesday, April 24

What Warm Days Do

The weather for the last four days have been perfect. I spent both days in city parks. One by the Hudson with my ex, Sunday in Prospect Park with a new guy I've been seeing.

April has really been a month about love - a big wave, as usual - and there couldn't have been a better time for me to realize how much love I generate and how much is being given to me. What scares me is the feeling of vulnerability that comes with. It's like pain is guaranteed, embrace it and go on. I don't feel that's being pessimistic. I think it's about acknowledging that there is armor to shed and baggage to unload. I think: I like this man. I want him around. I want him to know me. I don't want to be unafraid of this anymore.

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